Going on a date? Here is a list of must ask questions.

So you know, because I love you, I have compiled a list of first date questions. I know you are stuck in self isolation but cheer up after this lockdown there would be a lot of openings. A good number of relationships would have cracks as a result of partners staying locked together for so long. So get ready to hunt after the lockdown.

So without further ado, singles singletons and those of you who are just discovering how shitty your partners are.

Here are 6 questions your must ask on your first date.

1. Does your mood swing involve carrying a knife?

Bipolar woman, violent partners, toxic relationships, woman with knife

See this question you must ask it. Sister, do you carry a knife in your purse?
Do you have cutlass in that your big handbag?

Don’t go and be smiling sheepishly you better check his briefcase for portable sized cutlass, don’t say I did not warn you.

 

2. Do you accidentally cheat?

Cheating partners, date fails, worst date, relationship

You know, this things happen, you just slip, miss your steps and voila! You are in another woman’s bed. Does this sound familiar? Tell me.

3. Are your pink lips made in Oshodi

For the non Nigerians reading, Oshodi is a place in Lagos where you can get anything done from pink lips to plastic surgery and the amazing thing is, it is done in less than 15 minutes. Sounds great right. Try this and ‘Botched’ would have nothing on you.
I need to know if I would be kissing natural lips or caustic soda in advance. Thank you.

4. Are you afraid of cockroach

Fear of cockroach, date night, first date questions

How best do I say this? Someone has to kill all the cockroaches in this relationship and its definitely not me. So you see? If you are going to be running from cockroaches then keep that same energy and run out of my life.

5. Are you always in the comment section begging for giveaway?

Begging

You better ask this question. Before you introduce them to your friends that you have found the one, only for your friends to see them on Tunde Ednut’s page dragging for giveaway. Don’t let anybody come and embarrass you.

6. Do you think 5G is the cause of coronavirus?

Him: Yes it’s all part of China and Bill Gates plan to vaccinate the entire world

Me: My Uber has arrived, boy bye.

I owe it to my future children that their father is smart. No hard feelings.

Bonus Question

7. Are you related to Lai Mohammed?

First date questions

Comments

  1. Dew

    Lol. This is hillarious. I also find a way to ask his genotype. I know how to get the answer without even seeming like I’m asking. Lol, I’m that good. Nice one

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